BAD DAYS

I told my son that I was sad, that I was having a bad day. I said it to him as if he would understand. He’s four.

Why did I feel the need to share that with him?

It was like a warning. I already felt the need to apologize to him, though I hadn’t done anything wrong. But just in case mom is too quiet… Just in case I yell about something stupid, just in case I’m lazy today, or you hear me cry…

“I am just a little sad son. I am just having a bad day.”

“Tomorrow I will be better. I promise.”

He says… “It’s okay to be sad mom. “

He hugs me and says, “I know you’re sad, but I want to tell you something. I love you mom.”

I am sad, and I am having a bad day. But because of him, tomorrow will be better.

I promise.

DEAR SON

Dear son,
You’re sleeping now, so this will probably be the best moment for me to spill my guts out.
There was a time when I couldn’t see myself wanting or having kids, and now, I can’t imagine my life without you.
I look back and wonder what my purpose was. Sure, I had dreams and goals but since you’ve come into my life, you make me want to try harder… And my purpose is more clear.
I want to be everything that I can for you, do everything that I can for you.
I want to raise a young boy into a great man, see you learn and grow…
I look forward to everything you’re going to accomplish in life.
You’re my child, but you’re also my best friend.
The love you show me as my son, doesn’t compare to anything else in this world.
You tell me I’m the bestest, or coolest, person you’ve ever met in your life…
Venice, the same goes for you kiddo.
Today you turn four.
My big kid, with a sarcastic tongue, attitude like no other, whose favorite phrase is “what the hell”…  
I love you to the moon and back.
Always.
Happy birthday my son!

The cake I made for my child.

Edit: just read this to him, and though he may not have understood it all, his smile turned into a grin and he gave me a huge hug and said… “I love you so much. Thanks mom” ♥️

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